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♔ 14 November 2009
7:41:00 PM |
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A DAMMMM funny parody that describes the whole court case that is going on now.
Once upon a time a very evil company named SME accidentally brought five AMAZING guys together in a group called DBSK. The boys worked hard and were very talented, but because SME is evil, they took all of the boys' money and treated them like slaves, working them to the bone for mere pennies.
Even though DBSK loves their fans very much, they are humans too and couldn't take anymore of SME's constant taking advantage of them. Because of that, they tried talking to SME about making a few changes, but just got ignored for months on end. Basically, drama queen SME gave them the silent treatment.
So then DBSK was like "Well that's mature." and decided to sue seeing as how it would be easier to negotiate with a bedside table than with SME.
And then SME realised they were being sued for the 4765th time, so they called up the team of lawyers they use DBSK's money to pay for that they keep on hand year-round, just in case someone decides to sue them, seeing as how it happens a lot. But apparently they've been out of practice for a bit because so far they're kind of doing a sucky job. :/
And then SME's financial advisers were like "Uh... we got a problem." and SME was all "Wai?" and then the advisers explained "Yeah, you know how SME has been making a lot of money? Okay well, that money comes from DBSK. Therefore if something happens to DBSK, you will lose a lot of money. Which is bad, because they're suing you. Why are you guys so stupid that you're paying us money to tell you something so obvious?"
So then SME was all "HOSHOOT!!! Quick, everyone think of ways to make more money off of DBSK real fast!" and someone suggested selling dvds and someone else suggested cancelling SMTown Live and someone else suggested actually trying to compromise but everyone ignored him and they just tried the first two things.
And then someone else was like "Heeeeeey, remember all that money DBSK made us at Tokyo Dome? Let's all of a sudden sign them up for another concert and then leech the money off them again!" and everyone else was all "Okay! That's a great idea! Let's do it!" and someone rushed off to set everything up at the last minute behind DBSK's backs.
So then someone remembered that they should probably tell the boys, since they kind of needed them to perform and all.
So they were like "YO, DBSK! We's got you another concert at Shenzen and actually it's been scheduled since last year and not two seconds ago, why do you ask? so we just thought you might want to know, so... yeah! Be there or we'll beat the crap out of you or be square!" and JaeChunSu kinda just stared at them all like "WTF???" and went to go consult their lawyer.
And since their lawyer is awesome, he just rubbed his head because SME is really dumb and gives him migraines on a daily basis. So when he found out SME randomly signed DBSK up for a concert without consulting any of them (which, helloooo, is kind of why they're suing in the first place) and then demanded that DBSK show up and perform whether they liked it or not when they haven't even paid DBSK since February... Yeah, he was kinda displeased.
So then he went to SME and was like "Okay SME, now listen closely, I know this is a difficult concept" and everyone stopped giggling over something really stupid and just kind of stared at him. So the lawyer continued, saying "Okay, you guys are kinda dumb, so it's obvious you're just using this concert to make more money from DBSK while you still have the chance before I pwn you all. I know you're greedy, so quite frankly, I expected this. But since your lawyers suck, apparently, I just wanted to come over and clear things up for you a bit. Because I'm a nice guy like that. So when the courts ruled that you couldn't make DBSK perform without their consent... Well, that basically means you can't make DBSK perform without their consent." (Brief pause as everyone from SME looks completely confuzzled) "So that means that if, say, you go behind DBSK's backs and schedule a concert in- oh, I don't know, let's say Shenzen, for instance- well, they kinda don't have to listen to you." And then he booked it from the building real fast because SME finally realised that the Courts' ruling wasn't just pointless gibberish and that it actually did matter and they went all HULKSMASH!!! on the building and totally broke a few chairs and whatnot. But luckily DBSK's lawyer is really fast so he was okay.
But DBSK actually really like performing and they love their fans so they kinda wanted to do the concert after all. But then they realised that SME still hadn't paid them since February so they probably wouldn't get paid for this either and they kind of wondered what the point of suing was if they were just gonna let SME trick them into doing stuff for free again. So they told SME that they would totally do the concert even though they didn't have to seeing as how SME scheduled it without their permission even after this whole thing had started... and they only had one condition. All they wanted was for SME to show them the details of the contract. And SME was apalled that DBSK actually wanted to know the details of their own gig OMG what was the world coming to? Where were the good old days of artist slavery disappearing to?
So DBSK's lawyer went to try to smooth things over a bit, explaining that DBSK would do the concert just so long as SME would let them know the details of everything. You know, because it's kind of nice to know what the job you're being forced to do actually entails, and all.
But SME didn't really respond too well, because they're really unused to anyone else trying to get their way and SME is usually the one issuing ultimatums. So they decided that instead of letting the boys see the contract for the Shenzen concert, they wouldn't say anything about that and would instead tell JCS to get their butts back in SME by the 12th OR ELSE.
JCS were kinda confused because SME kept saying the Shenzen concert was gonna happen, so they practiced really hard because they thought maybe SME's greed would win out over their stupidity. But unfortunately they figured wrong because when JCS just kept quiet on the 12th, SME pitched a girly little fit a ROYAL HISSY and tried to make fans all upset by saying that the concert was cancelled because JCS "refused" to participate.
And then the boys' lawyer went and tore all of his hair out due to sheer frustration because SME was being so difficult, so now he is bald.
THE END.So I guess SME tried to be all sneaky and they were like "Looook, a new concert,
where did that come from? YOU'RE TOTALLY DOING THIS,
SLAVES JaeChunSu!" And JCS were like "Okay fine, we like concerts and we love our fans but you have to pay us this time, so can we see the concert contract, pls?" and SME was all "Aw,
HALE NAW, you
did not just ask us that!!!" and that's where we are at right now.
To everyone who is wondering why JaeChunSu didn't "refuse" the concert earlier...They did.
They told SME straight up from the start that they would do it only if the could see the contract details.
And SME left them hanging. They never said "No, we won't do that", so that the boys could publicly declare that the concert would not happen. The boys were probably thinking that the concert might still go on, which is why they were preparing.
And now that JCS didn't give in to SME's demand, they are trying to spin this issue in their favor.
It's not JCS's fault that SME left them hanging. I'm sure they made their position clear from the very beginning, so please stop blaming them.
Supporting letter for DBSKSource: TVXQasia
Translation: smiley + 2MY + sshutingg @ OneTVXQ.com
Credits: OneTVXQ.com { One World. One Red Ocean. One TVXQ! }
TVXQ and Cassiopeia are one. (TVXQ and Cassiopeia, we are one.)TVXQ, the Rising Gods of the EastCassiopeia, the guardian of the constellation of TVXQRecently, there have been a lot of news regarding TVXQ, and we are very worried; SM is currently using many ways to attack TVXQ in an attempt to divide the gods and us. These actions are unbearable, but SM will never tear us apart.Six years have already passed, and we now have enough strength to protect TVXQ. We made a promise that no matter what happens we will stand by TVXQ. We love you and believe in you, just like we have since the beginning.Please do not forget our promise. When you are sad and down, there is still us. When you are sad, happy, or having a hard time, just turn your head and we will always be there for you, to support and cheer you on.TVXQ, we will walk with you to the end.During those six years, we have matured, and have gained trust for one another. Every scene has been imprinted onto our minds; the sadness, the pain, the touching moments, and the happiness - these are what we shared together. Every single page is the footprints of love. We have grown up maturely; though we may not be able to do much, we have chosen to believe and we choose to protect willingly.We always wanted to say out loud, "Dong Bang Shin Ki, it has been tough for you, but all the sweat and tears were worth it. Please take care of yourselves!Dong Bang Shin Ki, please take the courage and the love from each one of us, and keep moving forward.We will support you towards the road to the future!Cassiopeia will always be by your side. We will never leave!We are TVXQ's Cassiopeia forever.
Meow! Airel loves cats!
one thing about me is i'm independent. i can go anywhere alone because i feel that me, myself is who i'm most comfortable with.
i'm passionate about cats, i can stare all day at one, no kidding.
and purple. oh holy purple! thank God for creating purple!
i do believe in the compatibility of different horoscopes.
yes i'm an Aries. any Leo and Sagittarius out there?=)